BEHIND THE PLAY #73

I’ve said, somewhere along the line here, that these newsletters are about how the game intersects with life. While generally true it is most definitely so in this issue.

Watch this video. It’s from a CBBC series called Our School. I would suggest once you do, you will likely watch it again. If not right away then at some point in the future. It had a big impact on me as both a parent and as someone who coached kids for 23 years.

There is a lot to unpack in this video. First off, I’m approaching this video from the perspective of transferability to the coaching realm and this article from the perspective that working with young people over a long period of time is a privilege that we should be be commit to doing as well as possible. So let’s some bullet points to begin with to frame this:

• I said in an early edition of BTP that what we provide kids when they play soccer is a platform. We make it safe, welcoming and professional but the stage is theirs to take what they need from it and make the experience what they want. How we build that platform though is integral to facilitating kids getting what they need and want from the experience of playing on a team.

• The CSA (Canadian Soccer Association) introduced a Children’s License about six years ago. It was a new, year-long certification program aimed at those who work with players up to U12. The first batch of coaches taking often scratched their heads when they described it to me as it wasn’t about how you teach young players technical skills or basic patterns of play. It was about understanding how they learn and what they needed from coaches in terms of support. It was more about child psychology than developing young superstars. For me, it’s proved to be a prescient and necessary move in coach education.

• I repeatedly say, here and in my work at my club, that my main metric for the success of our club is that we graduate teams at U18 in every boys and girls division that is offered. That is a sign that we are keeping players in the game through our efforts at the tier and commitment level that they want to engage with it. We don’t always do it but I think everyone who works in youth club soccer should at least use this as a compass to gauge how their club is doing.

First off, the kids in this classroom are an incredible group. For eleven year olds their intelligence in terms of how they express themselves and their emotional IQ is stunning. However, the reason we are able to see this is because the kids feel safe in expressing support and vulnerability. That’s a culture that has been fostered by their teacher Mrs Robinson.

Kain is the focal point of the story. Raised by his grandparents after his mother wasn’t capable of looking after him and his brother, they plucked them out of what sounded like it would be a second (or more) stint in foster care. Kain is full of confidence, intelligence and fun as his initial poses in the video around the 36 second mark show. That segues into footage of home life with his grandparents and younger brother where he dotes on pet rabbits and goes on family walks in the Yorkshire countryside. He presents as care-free, confident and thriving. Kain is adamant that all is now great at home, at school and in life in general.

Mrs Robinson, to be crystal clear from the outset, is an absolute champ. It comes through in how her students conduct themselves and the support she gives them. The narrator/host of the video, Mr. Swain, is a guest in Mrs Robinson’s class that day. He, openly gay (I watched a longer version of the video where he talks about this), talks to the kids about identity and how that can mean families are often structured very differently and peers may not know what their friends are coming to terms with internally, as he experienced. The idea being that having an environment that kids feel safe in can lead to discussions around things they aren’t sure others will understand and/or sympathize with. It also leads to a more productive, interactive classroom with input from everyone encouraged and expected when they see themselves as allies, or as a tribe as Mr. Swain says.

This is much like the environment we would like to foster in the teams we coach. I’ve often described a kids’ youth soccer team as a second network to the friend group they have at school. It’s important for kids to have an alternate friend group because sometimes one is going through some upheaval and needs stepping away from for awhile.

The 2 minute and 12 second mark in the video is important. Mr Swain cautiously asks Kain if he’d like to share his description of his family. It’s clear, and this is important, that they have discussed this ahead of time and he is not putting him on the spot out of the blue. He is giving Kain the chance to choose if he feels comfortable sharing his family background. Kain is in the mode we have seen him throughout the video to this point: self-assured, talkative, unfazed. Kain says, “Yeah, it’s fine.” and launches into his description of his family starting with, “So, I don’t live like everyone else…”

He describes a life with a mom and her boyfriend fighting in front of them. Social services getting involved, foster care, etc. Several of the kids look on nervously, a bit shocked, but attentively.

And then the facade crashes. He looks towards Mrs Robinson and Mr Swain and the weight of all this kid has been carrying just crashes out of him. He looks at them like he’s drowning and hoping they might be able to throw him something to keep him afloat as suppressed tears and sobs follow.

The life preservers come from many directions. An early whisper from one of his friends saying “it’s okay Kain.”, Mrs Robinson in fast with a long, critically-needed hug. Other classmates are close to tears but it doesn’t take long for several to dogpile Kain in hugs of support along with Mrs Robinson while Mr Swain expresses empathy as he holds back his own tears.

The maturity of his classmate, Ibby, saying he’s proud of him and that’s it’s nice he was able to get it off his chest is pure leadership. This is your team captain. He’s part of the dogpile support. He puts the confusing emotions these kids have into words that make sense and keep them all pointed in the right direction.

But not every classroom would be this supportive, just as not every team would be. How do you get your team or any group of kids you’re working with to this stage? How do you create a culture that sees kids invested in each other, wanting to be there, wanting to be part of each other’s narratives whether they’re successes or challenges?

It starts with Mrs Robinson. Those kids respect and trust her. We don’t get to see what she has done in the days, weeks, months that she has likely been their teacher but she has created a culture in that classroom that they have all clearly bought into.

Culture is the lifeblood and reset button for teams and when you’re working with kids it’s up to you as the coach to create it. It can be as simple as a defining gesture. This informs tone and direction and those are key ingredients to getting the results on and off the field that you are striving for.

I recently came across a great example how one gesture can inform the end result. I was watching a 1999 Beastie Boys concert in Glasgow. It starts with their DJ, alone on stage, mixing and scratching. Really just alerting the crowd that the show is about to begin. The stage is a full circle set in the middle of the crowd. Very suddenly, all three Beasties emerge from an unseen access point at crowd level up and onto the stage. At a full sprint. In a tight formation and in almost matching clothes. They are on stage less than two seconds before launching into the show and making clear the expectation for the evening and what they will be bringing to meet it. In those two seconds, they have gained full buy-in from the crowd and sustain that for the entire show. Everybody in that building is all-in on having a good time.

A football equivalent to the Beasties is Marcelo Bielsa’s manic pressing in the Chile game versus Spain in the 2010 World Cup. Yes, this was hardly the only game he employed intense pressing but it was a statement that defined the culture of that team. Facing the 2008 Euro Champions and eventual 2010 World Cup champions, this clip shows that from the opening whistle, Bielsa’s greyhounds were going to be relentless. In the first 20 seconds their work forces Casillas to punt the ball long and give away possession. So much Spanish possession-based football. Bielsa can only make that work if he has eleven zealots on the field willing to work in a coordinated fashion until their lungs explode and he got it from his Chile team and got it from others like Leeds United.

I feel confident in saying that no one in Mrs. Robinson’s class felt left out or left behind. I also feel confident saying no one looked forward to playing a Marcelo Bielsa side regardless of who was in the starting eleven for them because they knew what was coming and it would be applied mercilessly for 90 minutes. And lastly, I also feel confident that no one left that Beastie Boys show in Glasgow disappointed.

In summary:

• Mrs Robinson - acceptance and support for each other

• Beasties - joy, energy and celebration

• Bielsa - resolve and shared physical work

Different goals and different means employed in trying to attain them. In the end though, these are of course all just different flavours of unity. They are all representations of a culture of unity. In education, the performing arts and football. It is conscious leadership that defines an entity and propels it towards its goal: empathetic people, euphoria, winning.

A teacher and her class. A band and their audience. A coach and his team. In none of these three situations is the culture driven by the primary element of the profession (teaching, music, playing football). It is the context within which the actions occur that make them special. It is how the group functions as such rather than what they do that matters and that exists due to deliberate decisions that on the surface may not seem apparent but when closely examined prove to be the foundational piece that allows the teacher to make better people, the band to send people home happy and the team to win it’s game.

So how do you do this as someone coaching young players?

1. Establish trust. That’s done by consistently showing up on time, demonstrating empathy and treating each player as an individual but also treating them all the same in terms of fairness.

2. Don’t solve problems for them. Frame them as questions and allow them the time to solve them individually and as a group. The game is theirs. Part of that is working together to figure things out. They then build trust in each other and leadership in themselves.

3. See adversity as a great tool. Overcoming challenges in games (short a player, bad weather, strong opponent) doesn’t always have to mean you win the game but when a coordinated effort in the face of difficulties is achieved, make sure they are aware of what they did, together, regardless of whether they won, lost or drew. Shared adversity bonds people and engenders respect amongst them.

4. Learn their names right away and learn how to say them properly. Don’t invent bullshit nicknames as a cop out to calling a child by their proper name or another name or nickname of their choice. Show them that you see them as an individual right from the outset.

You can create and maintain an excellent team culture regardless of the age or level of play of your team. Right now I’m thinking of two girls’ teams we had that played in the lowest division of league play right through to U18. They had a friendly rivalry but more importantly their coaches kept both teams viable, with very minimal roster atrophy, all the way through to their last year. High functioning teams with great parent buy-in. Never heard a single complaint from players or parents on either team. The coaches were always happy to get feedback from staff and support at their training sessions. Just a fantastic example of a team culture that kept players in the game.

When we talk of giving back to the game its not enough to just show up. We need to make the game a bit better than it was before we got involved. At the team level, we all have varying ability in terms of technical and tactical knowledge but almost all adults who coach a team, either as a parent volunteer coach or a paid staff coach, have to see their first priority as building a culture that players are drawn to and trust. That doesn’t have to come from having decades of playing experience. It comes from being a decent human being that understands you are in a position of trust that some kids really need to see being taken seriously. Embrace that responsibility and maybe you’ll have the good fortune to make a difference the way Mrs Robinson clearly did with her class.